People with identity disturbances borrow pieces of others (language, habits, hair styles, thoughts, pictures, experiences, conflicts, stories, people, illness, addresses, clothing, generosity, reasons, rationale, business ideas, jobs, creativity, intellect, travel, deodorant) to craft a version of self that seems desirable or functional because on their own they are neither functional nor very desirable and they lack everything they “borrow” from you.
Instead of truly connecting, they “download” part of you to use elsewhere – without credit, without context and for their own benefit – all intentionally.
You give real love and thoughtfulness and they re-brand it to impress others or fulfill a need. This is emotional mimicry from people who manipulate intimacy because they lack almost everything and have mental and emotional issues. These folks also think this is “normal” because in their worlds it is.
They blur reality and think it’s a power play. “I can take something that meant something to you and make it mine, for someone else.” It’s a way to erase or override your role, lessen you to them, get the one-up and test if you’d notice or react.
This is also typical of people who have weak core identity – meaning they are not capable of generating new things so they reuse the ones they download and take from others. They misappropriate what is yours as if it was theirs both in front of you and behind your back. It’s a completely false narrative they perpetuate and they get off on it.
They build a false version of themselves to control others. They transact, not connect. They create a collage of what they think will work, using a borrowed self. This is why they need so many people to borrow from, because alone they are completely nothing and inherently emotionally and intellectually stunted and lazy. So they create a complex fantasy to feel in control, but hey, some feelings just aren’t real.